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I've Got a Sin

I've got a sin, I've got a weight I'm a'carrying
I've got a sin, I've got a weight I'm a'carrying
I'm not too proud to admit I'm dying
I once felt free but now I'm tryin'
to keep these faults and shame I hold from burying me
but I've got a sin and and I've got a way of carrying things

I've got a scar, I've got a cancer in my heart
I've got scars and I've got a cancer in my heart
With so much resting on my doubting being made well or sorted out
I wonder if I overlooked what peace I'd found
While digging new wounds while trying carve some answers out
Now I've got a scar and still have a cancer in my heart

I've got a way, I've got a way of breaking down
I've got a way, I've got a way of faking things now
I blame my lack of understanding
for why I lost my will to stand
and fell for miles to rupture on the stoney ground
I still can't say that I'm a better man right now
I've got stains and I've got a way of breaking down

I've got thoughts, I've got a memory torturing me
I think a lot and I've got a memory torturing me
of when you once swore you were never leaving
as you left me lying in the thorns a'bleeding
where I grew numb and gave up on a lot of things
Now I've got thoughts, I've got a memory torturing me

I’ve got a fire, I’ve got a burning in my soul
I’ve got a fire and I’ve got a burning in my soul
but masterfully self defeating keeps me on the sidelines seeing
those I once inspired move beyond and grow
while I stay planted, rooted in my comfort zone
I’ve got a fire, but burning out is all I’ve known

I've got a lie, I've got a line for covering things
I've got lies, I've got lines for everything
That stem from my fear of connection
and serve as calloused self protection
built to build these walls too thick for shattering
I can't lie, I've got lies for covering things
But Lord I'm trying to keep my mind on recovering

I've got a truth, I've got redemption in my veins
I swear that it’s true, I feel conviction in my ways
When kingdom calls those bound for glory
if I ain't worthy, Lord ignore me
but know I'm trying to mend my torn, abhorrent ways
I've got a truth, I've got redemption in my veins
I've got a truth, I've got it rotting in my veins
but I’ve got a lie and I’ve got a way of covering things
I’ve got a mind and I’ve got a memory torturing me
I've got a sin and I've got a way of carrying things
I’m giving in, I’ve got a way of ruining things

The Light of the Unknown

When I broke myself to pieces trying to mend my broken trust 
I swore I'd never change myself just to be loved
but rather wait for one to love the pieces of the peaceless heart
that I'd neglected and let crumble into dust

Then there was you;
smiling like a light among the wailing storm 
Giving strength, and grace, and comfort I'd not known
Though I felt safer in hiding 
I placed my defenses behind me 
and walked straight into the light of the unknown 

I assumed that peace would find me 
when a last breath was denied me; 
but not here on earth, alive and well with you 
Though I still look like what I've been through
it seems never to effect you seeing me as something better than I do

Who am I; but a man so undeserving of such offered grace?
More inclined to shun redemption than be saved
You said,
"Allow whoever is blameless here to cast their stones at you
You'll find you're safe here, Child - we all have faltered too"

Through a worn, weathered exterior falsely projecting might
You said each crack within the darkness helped reveal the inner light
Everyone who claims their brokenness can be made whole in time
and your present self can be someone you were

Rather than condemn my faithlessness you offered faith in life 
and brought light into the darkness that I'd known
When I should have been damned for faithlessness
you brought my faith to life 
and led me straight into the light of the unknown
You showed grace beyond all kinds I’d ever known
You brought light into the blackness I called home
You led me straight into the light of the unknown

An Owl Among The Cherry Trees

An owl among the cherry trees 
was backlit by such a masterpiece
of burnt orange and amber swirling
shimmering off every dripping leaf
as golden rays fought through the clouds
to pour themselves upon the ground
refracted through the glistening creek
that soon the storm would heighten

Reflections swayed and dissipated
in ripples from the coming rain
casting breathless dancing shadows 
as the churning sky was devoured in grey
A portrait spilled upon the earth in purest form
such boundless worth that went completely unobserved
by eyes transfixed on devices

What a waste
What a waste
I guess true artists still create when no one cares 

Snoqualmie Falls

I had this dream that you ran away with me 
To some place warm, southern and wild
just east of lake ocachobe 
we sat all night, together silently 
and watched restless waves stretch from the ocean
to beat the shore mercilessly
Yet subtly it seemed somehow so serene 
It's fascinating discovering imagined things previously left unexplored 

But back on earth I'm in your bedroom
and it’s just the way you left it 
when you left, assuming you'd come back again...
So don't wake me up 

In my head we're in Snoqualmie  
Trapped in a rare late winter snowfall the road is all but vanishing
We drive all night
You’re laying in my back seat 
Your restless hair pressed to the window
our dog sleeping at your feet 
It seems so real
It seems free 
And for awhile it seems to stretch on endlessly 

But your funeral is this weekend
and I'm weakened by the fact we’ll both be there;
One voluntarily and one the main attraction

In my dream it’s all a nightmare and you come walking back in 
and kiss my cheek
and call me stupid for thinking this ever happened...
So don’t wake me up
Please don’t wake me up 

Titusville, 321

To keep myself moving forward I’ve been traveling back
To near where I was born and all my family is trapped 
That’s my height marked on the door
I’ve been taller than that for a quarter century now or so 

Everything seems different but little has ever changed
The faces feel familiar but with different first names 
They must be kids of kids of kids I knew
seven or eighth generation by now I’d suppose 

I guess...
Everyone ages, everyone grows up till they die
We make a few minor arrangements then
everyone goes on with their lives 
Ain’t it funny how we always act surprised?

I heard you bought that little storefront
that you once threw a brick through
back when you still dressed in style
What a perfect little nest for you to pour savings into 
Maybe I’ll smash the windows tonight

Instead I changed my mind and sat inside your new delicatessen 
Where I learned of how the protestor had become the protested
By some kids who still dressed in style
And took their anger out in familiar ways

You said that they remind you of you
Even anarchists tire in time, I’m proof

So I walked down the shoreline through the humid air
I’ve learned that everyone is free to confine themselves somewhere
 - including me
I lost myself here once
Maybe I’m still out there aimlessly wandering
Who’s to know?
Not me

To keep myself moving forward 
I’ve been traveling back
To near where I was born and all my family is trapped 
I’ve found: 
Everyone ages, everyone grows up till they die
We make a few minor arrangements
then everyone goes on with their lives 
Ain’t it funny how we always act surprised?

Maybe I’m Alright...

It washes over me 
in an overwhelming need to cling to all the flaws we are 
Would it do me well
to deny my own uncertainties for a temperate heart?

or maybe I’m alright...

When it all comes down,
Is the faith I built my world around my own cross to bear?
Do I question now 
every answer ever offered out of my own childish fear?

Maybe I’m alright
Maybe I’m alright 

Can I be free again - if I’ve never been?
Can I find comfort in my faith the way my father did? 
Can I believe again - if I never did?
Can I find confidence in grace despite my faithlessness?
There was a moment once when it all made sense 
I felt that everything was pure and I was innocent 
I’m scared of speaking this, but I’m not convinced
That it was faith and not simply the trust of youthfulness 

As it wraps me in its arms I float away 
For a moment held in time, I find a calm and sacred place
and as it covers me in light I feel ashamed 
That I was ever prone to doubting all the promises you’d made 

or Maybe I’m alright
Maybe I’m alright 
Maybe I’m alright
Maybe I’m alright...

So What?

I should warn you It’s better if I don’t 
try to justify the lines and promises I broke 
If it helps you I was hurt more than it showed;
but so what?
I won’t even try
To explain my way around the reasons I’ll deny
If you need an honest answer I can lie...I’ll go on 

You will always be 
You alone will be be the wound that I endure through
You will always be 
You alone will be the lesion I adore 

I could earn your trust and barely even try 
Just to harm your heart in places others couldn’t find 
In the vastness near your absent peace of mind
I’ll be there 

Oh, believe me 
You only want me when you’re drowning
So I’ll hold you down until you need me
Oh, believe me 
You only want me when you’re drowning 
So I’ll hold you down until you need me 

You will never age for me 
Nor fade, or ever die
You alone will e’er remain eternal in my eyes
How the wounded cling to saviors un-divine
so what? 

Horribly Lonesome

It’s true, I used to feel it pure to play the broken 
Such a slave to the artist in me 
Bleeding from the heart made me seem open
in some self-righteous display of defeat
But I see it now,
the way it fell out as self-deprecating; my subconscious release 
When I wrote it down, the way it felt drowning and gasping for air being...

Horribly lonesome 
And tired of falling apart at the seams 
Everyone knows some sweet, subtle way of conjuring up their relief 
I’m trying to hold some resemblance to a man unafraid of defeat 
But horribly lonesome is what I’ve become
by always pretending to be

Now I’ve grown
There’s gotta be a way to fake the progress
toward who I was sure I would be  
There’s a noticeable change in age and context,
But failure is still constant in me
I don’t know if there’s a known way to find the value of a man
Who’s never whole, but somehow feels alright?

Rome

Hold me in your arms and then
await the due, untimely end 
when every kingdom built falls to decay  
Nothing is eternal in a world devoid of innocence 
and built upon the sands of mortal men

I’ll be the very last thing you see 
The moment you float away from me 
Forever in a state of release
Baby, am I breaking your heart?
Whether the devil when you close your eyes
Or heaven awaits
or afterlife is utterly a state of deceit 
Baby, am I breaking your heart?

Holy, velvet voices claim a dignity that’s been erased 
The past: a glorious empire declined 
Frailty’s a violent thing that’s viciously devouring 
the smiling, arm-in-arm in blind demise 

Nothing withstands forever / Divided we end together

Someone to Hold or to Be Held By

I see over your walls
You don’t scare me at all 
Though you think you know everything about me
I’m afraid that we’re about to face hard times
It’s part of growing, that’s all

Take my hand it’s tired of trembling 
for someone to hold or to be held by
I’m keeping you closer than I can remember 
holding anyone else in my mind 

When you don’t need me to be everything
Know darling, I can be your anything 
Darlin’, you will always be mine

I’ll carry you down when you float through the memories 
flooded in doubts that should drive me away
You’ll take me for granted but you’ll understand when you’re taller and wiser someday 

I’ve seen all the cracks in the paths that you’ll come to 
I’ve traveled beyond what you presently know
I’ll never mislead you, but sometimes you’ll need to 
Stumble through the thorn on your own 

I feel like there’s gonna be a moment when you fear everything 
That you’ve ever known is your enemy 
but I will never be
You will never be lost 
Of that I feel sure

Shooting at Satellites

Oh darlin of mine would you change your name
Move into a van and go chasing fame
Pour your heart out for hours on a worthless stage 
Oh darlin of mine would you change your name
Darlin of mine would you change your name 

Oh darlin of mine would you ride with me 
In a loop from Tacoma to the 813?
A few cities still pay me to sing off key
And tell stories and lies of how we’re living free  
Darlin of mine would you ride with me

I’m not saying that well last forever
we might not make it through tonight 
I’m just saying if we band together
it’s better than two hearts un-intwined 
Am I shooting at satellites?
Am I shooting at satellites, darling of mine?

Oh darlin of mine would you waste your youth
For the sake of a call to some forgotten truth
Would you sever your ties, and dig up all roots
Oh darlin of mine would you waste your youth 
Darlin of mine, never waste your youth 



But Who Will Save The Savior?

You were a liar and I a poet 
They’ve always seemed the same to me 
Either way we found our own simulated security 
Sometimes I’d stare through the ceiling numbed beyond the will to care 
When everything that’s normal felt too beautiful to bear

Life goes on 
as the heartache turns to healing 
apathy gives birth to feelings it itself can not destroy
but then it’s gone
and we’re fumbling and reeling
Through a fog that’s all concealing 
making life hard to enjoy
It still goes on and on and on and on

When your heart meter formed a long draw
and the nurse’s eyes met mine 
I felt my throat close up and inspiration vanish from my mind 
While walking out I pushed a father from a laughing conga line 
Pink bubble gum cigars announcing his first daughter had long at last arrived 

I made it home through wretched traffic of the coming home parade
Though it took hours. 
The news banners read the war had gone away
I passed a young girl in the stairwell 
tears were running down her face 
They’d said her father was a savior 
I guess no one thinks to save their savior once they’re safe

The Man Who Tests How Thick The Ice Is

It seems that I've spent my whole life leaving things
I guess it's been to make the first move before something left on me
I've thrown stones and I've shot arrows at open doors and family
and burned bridges and killed things before they've grown

It probably came from being scared of something;
and I guess that stemmed from knowing I was wrong
I'm pushing 30 now and still feel like I'm a child
All the while feeling ancient from how tarnished I've become

oh oh oh 
living ain't been bad to me you know
Though times have come down hard and getting by ain't easy 
it's the only way of life I've ever known 

Mom, I know I've never been your perfect child
and I've probably made you cry more often than I've made you smile
with all these years of running making me more feral and far wilder
than a mother'd like to see her grown child be

But it's nothing that you've done that sent me wandering
Know it ain't a lack of love that makes me roam
So please don't ever feel inclined to blame yourself for where I've faltered
I just have this restless side for things that are wild and unknown

oh oh oh 
living ain't been bad to me you know
Though times have come down hard and getting by ain't easy 
it's the only way of life I've ever known 

Is it better to be killed by man or conscience?
Is it easier to fight with hands or doubt?
Sometimes I feel like I'm a father going to test how thick the ice is;
in part to keep safe those who follow me, part the thrill that I might drown

Well this world it ain't too often been a friend to me
so I hope they lay my body down somewhere in Tennessee
Because it’s always made me feel a bit more comforted and free
than anywhere else I've found

Someone as Broken as Me, Just Like You

What if I came into your life and made you feel wanted
would it be alright if I wrapped your hand in mine
and never let go or once left your side?
I know it seems strange coming from me, my Dear
But I don't want to be on my own now

What if you were unstable like me
cautious of closeness and being deceived
Would you still put your faith is us
as something unending and worthy of trust?
I know it seems strange, being asked this from me
But I don't want to be on my own anymore

All of my wasted life I've been waiting for someone as broken as me, just like you
to make me feel open enough to say to,
"I know if seems strange, coming from me, my Dear
but I don't want to be on my own anymore”

Providence, MO

I count my blessings night and morning on a single hand
That lost three fingers chopping timber
when the busted buzzsaw jammed 
So we traveled east to Alabama, for better lives to find 
Toward better homes and better weather
Better unemployment lines 

The Lord blessed us with another boy
attached: a cursed mouth to feed
So little Jack’s been selling bottles 
while Mary Jane plays in the weeds
The frost has come and stayed to conjure 
the crops to dying with the leaves
Now Momma’s sick and baby’s crying 
Eviction man says time to leave again 

So I prayed for gold in Sacramento
but all the gold that I could find 
was the sun reflecting off the bottom
of this empty pan of mine 
They say that gold is just for fools;
but gold will drive a fool insane 
each time you dip your pan
and draw it out as empty as it came 

So I sold my pan and set to gambling 
For luck, I’ve heard, turns on a dime 
I rolled, and won, and filled my hands
then stumbled toward the county line 
He must have seen me throwing sevens 
and snuck up in the dark behind 
He split my skull and took my money
Left me bleeding there to die alone 

Dear Lord, if you recall my baby 
Heaven knows he’ll surely freeze 
Please take him up to over yonder 
If you care a thing for me 
Here I sit and here I ponder 
Laid beneath the dying trees 
My blood has dried me to the gravel 
The earth has wrapped me in her breeze
Still I wait and still I wonder 
Heaven hear my dying plea 
Please take my girl and take my baby 
So they don’t end up like me 
Please take my girl and take my baby
So they don’t end up like me 

Something Vicious

Is it honest of a boy to secretly enjoy
all the subtle things that break the seams 
and threaten to destroy his very way of blameless living?
His own path of guiltless ways? 
Do his questions need forgiving when his innocence decays?  

They said
“Though purity can never be replenished
grace may still be something you can win”
So I'll leave the front light on
and claim it helps you Grace, find your way home;
While kind of wishing somebody else wanders in

Can a lack of faith in man be traced to lack of faith in God?
I hope to God that I'm not faithless;
for without faith we'd all be lost
and forced to rely on the conscience of flawed humanity
Within a baseless state of tarnish that is grounded in nothing

They said though faultlessness cannot be rediscovered
innocence is something you can find again...
So I'll leave the front light on,
to help innocence find its way back home;
While kind of wishing somebody else wanders in

Do do do do da do do da da da...

I'll leave the front light on
and claim it helps you, faith, find your way home
While kind of wishing something vicious wanders in
I’ll leave the front light on 
And claim it helps you find your way back home 
While kind of wishing something vicious wanders in 

Crawl On...

I’ve lied for pleasure, I lied for pain
I lied for my amusement, to be mildly entertained 
I’ve lied to cover up the lies I made
All the while lying next to you
While lying that you were safe 

Though the darkness be upon me
 may the darkness never own me 
Through trial or gale or storm or tempest come 
May my past shine lights of warning 
Through the pitfalls laid before me 
Though the path be frail and thorny 
I’ll crawl on 

Maybe I’ve been a wanderer 
Because I’m too afraid to wonder 
for a moment what it feels like to feel sane 
so I’ve fed my fleshly hunger 
and bet on over-unders 
guessing the day I’ll die and in what way 
I crawl on 

Until your flower bed is satisfied 
with my sour flesh and swallowed lies 
and I float on toward fire or kingdom come 
Shed never once a tear for me 
but thank God for the misery 
My long overdue passing spared you from 
and crawl on 
Crawl on 

In The Throes

It won’t kill you 
But it’ll hurt a little while before it heals you 
Though you won’t fall through 
It’s gonna drain a little pride before it fills you 
Take a little lie from me 
In a little while you'll see 
You’ll be alright 

You might break down 
But you’ll learn to brave the waters when they surround 
There you’ll find out 
How your heroes earned their scars before they let you down  
Maybe when your comfort fades 
You can find a sacred place to feel alive 

A calm sea never once has killed a sailor 
Nor has ever tested his will or his strength 
Know you’ll not be asked to hold more than you’re able 
though it may be more than you would have believed 

Though it haunts you 
As it keeps you in the throes harm won’t befall you 
When you’ve lost truth 
Be a testament of hope as one who crawled through 

Nothing is a flawless thing 
Everything is flawlessly a little wrong 
I guess it takes a broken ground 
To let a little life grow out to something strong 

Childish Things (Break Your Heart Slowly)

Fear is not a childish thing 
Neither is my cause for doubting 
Nor the way I keep the entrance watched and exits wide 
Time is for discovering things 
but everything to know has been found
and nothing's new or sacred, pure of heart - including me 
Fear is not the enemy 
You’ve never feared your enemies 

I’m only gonna break your heart dear slowly
I'm only gonna wreck your world awhile 
I'm only gonna drag you down 
then hold you under 
I only wanna break your heart
I only wanna break your heart a little while

Look me in the eyes, 
I swear darlin', you can see right through me 
to the secrets that I’ve locked and snares 
that I have laid before you, dear 
hoping that you won't get to me 
if I harm you, I'm not worth the scars you'll bare 
Love is not the enemy 
You've always loved your enemies...

Kingdom of Vipers

So go on, hide in self-claimed righteousness and paint your pious faces
All the while sharpening your claws upon the sacred rock of ages 
But the wealth you gain from selling grace through holy prostitution 
Will not save you for the savior takes no cash for restitution anymore 

Pedaling penance for a salary
and a high rise by The Bowery overlooking all the trade ships coming in
Learning well recited verses used to line your hallowed purses 
How you damn yourselves auctioning redemption 

Turn away, turn away
I’m afraid I never knew you 
I’m ashamed of all that you do in my name
Turn away, turn away 
Don’t you know I see right through you? 
to the core of all of your familiar ways  

Neither for me nor against me 
You’re just trying to convince me that my failure as a man can be ignored 
But that we soiled doves and vagrants will merely dirty up the pavement
if forgiveness here on earth we can’t afford 

All of you salvation vendors know that sinners are big spenders 
When it comes to hiding from eternal flames
Oh, but grace is for the broken, and the hurting, and the hoping 
and you’re causing more to fall than can be saved

Turn away, turn away
I’m afraid I never knew you 
I’m ashamed of all that you do in my name
Turn away, turn away 
Don’t you know I see right through you?
I’m ashamed of all that you do
I’m afraid I never knew you
I’m ashamed of all that you do in my name...

Misery

I don’t even know if I care enough to ever cry at all 
Darling I suppose if I stare I could break through these walls 
If you don’t doubt me i doubt it, I’m doubting myself 
If it ain’t mine, life without it is just what I’ve been dealt 
If you’re planning to mend me then I don’t need your help 
Just get in line, far behind everybody else 

I ain’t lost I’m just wandering toward the wild and new
I’m sorry if that doesn’t fit the plans that you’d made for me and you 
Someday they may find me in blood on the tracks 
Peaceful and at home there more than safe and unpacked 
in the building of mortar and glass I’m expected to die in someday 

My dear I could use a little misery 
To help clear up the cause of our disparity   
and make me feel like I have a valid reason for this way I feel
because lately I feel so alone 

If you don’t know me by now 
You’ll never know me at all 

In The Presence of the Queen

darlin' you've got a way of saving me
I don't think you'll ever understand 
the way that your eyes bring hope into my life and shine light into the lightlessness of man 

Darlin' you've got a way of shaping me
into something that's far better than I am 
Through the peace that I find
when you're sleeping at my side 
I feel safe placing my heart into your hands 

You've got a way of making me
feel things that I could never comprehend 
I once felt complacent but you've been replacing
my fears with the will to love again 

Surely you must have mistaken me 
for somebody more worthy of your heart 
For no peasant should be among the presence of the queen 
yet still I open up my eyes and here you are 

A Once Exquisite Flame

You're back again to collect me; 
my darlings - Misery, dear Agony and sweet Apathy
I'll fetch my bags and you'll escort me 
off to some corner where it all feels far more frightening
But fear is not what frightens me 
half as much as knowing I might fail

I've searched my soul and found that I - I can go on
I can go on no more
I can go on no more
I can go on no more

I can recall when things still mattered
such subtle innocence I long now to recapture
I had a heart then, do you remember?
those childish passions now no more than stagnant embers 
of a once exquisite flame
I'll tell you honestly,
I don't recall if emotion is even something that I want to feel at all

I've searched my soul and found that I - I can go on
I can go on no more
I can go on no more
I can go on no more

Despite my growing faithlessness, I still have faith in saviors.
For I’ve been haunted by these demons 
and these graceless, fallen angels
but there’s an antonym for everything,
so there must be something faithful  
reaching down to drag me out 
while all these terrors fight to claim my longing soul
Oh, how ungrateful I must be for never feeling privileged 
that some hand selected me to be alive 
We're all forgiven, I've been told - if we confess
I must confess that my past is full of blemish 
and my future's full of failure, I'm afraid

Is there anybody there who has ever felt so all-uncertain 
about everything; but by timidly and questioningly searching
found peace and sense among the senselessness of human hurting? 
can you speak to me a word of grace, 
to calm and reassure me that you feel it? 
Can you feel it?
Could I feel it?

I know answers can be found and I've heard mercy never falters
But still, it's hard believing now as Im surrounded by these waters 
that have sought to bring an end
and take my soul as theirs to claim
as I fight hard to find a reason not to surrender to their weight
Can I feel it like you felt; 
the closest thing to an escape you'd ever found
created in me and have every apprehension stripped away?

Snowfall

Wait for me
I'll be here - cold, and with my arms around my knees
Trembling, longing for fragments of a fond and former peace
Lately, if you watch me, I can play a part that you'll believe
until you breathe easily
I'm not as strong as you perceived me once to be

The snow tonight has covered all your snares
and made it hard to find my way through safely
If I climbed or crawled through your defenses
would you see through my attempts at bravery?
Maybe, if you want me to, I'll fall apart and you'll escape
before you break down with me
I once believed in you as one to set me free

You don't know me
I don't even know myself

Wait for me.
I'll be here - cold, and with my arms around my knees
Trembling, longing for fragments of a fond and former peace
Lately, if you watch me, I can play a part that you'll believe
until you breathe easily
I'm not as strong as you perceived...
Wait for me.

Warzone Serenade

The buzzards all came flying in
to feed on what was dying and I found myself the victim of their ways
I guess I'm just the kind of kid
who's had so much given to him
I'd claim I hit a triple
when I was born on third base

Time burns slowly now
in the moments since the pin left the grenade
Still, it all feels calm, somehow
In the middle of a warzone serenade

I woke up in the lion's den
and found I had some lying friends
who swore I wouldn't fall where others fell
The light down at the tunnel's end
has faded out and grown dim
but I've found out that darkness suits me well

Time burns slowly now
in the moments since the pin left the grenade
Still, it all feels calm, somehow
In the middle of a warzone serenade

I guess it just comes down to knowing
when everything decays
It's okay for some things not to be okay
I guess it just comes down to knowing when it all goes up in flames
It's okay for some things not to end okay
It's okay for some things not to end okay

'Til We Die or Back Out

Don't mind me, Mister
I'm just gonna miss her and pray I don't show it at all
You've picked me up just enough to get back to my falling down
Guns and religion, whiskey and women
have nothing in common, they claim
but they draw truth from deceivers, stop leavers,
and give unbelievers a reason for faith

So if you hold the answers, then I'll hold the doubts
and we'll stumble together - 'til we die or back out
Then we'll look back and wonder what drew us apart at the seams
Then I'll keep what's left after you break the best parts of me

I think I'll lay here staring at the ceiling
trying to fight off what feelings may find me
All the half empty closets and boxes tell me that you're moving on
There's a hole in my mirror and blood on my hand
'cus I think that I once saw you out with that man
It hurts me to hurt you
But if you hurt when I do, then you must be dying right now

So if you hold the answers, then I'll hold the doubts
and we'll stumble together - 'til we die or back out
Then we'll look back and wonder what drew us apart at the seams
Then I'll keep what's left after you break the best parts of me

So if you hold the answers, then I'll hold the doubts
and we'll stumble together - 'til we die or back out
Then we'll look back and wonder what drew us apart at the seams
Then I'll keep what's left after you break the best parts of me
I'll keep whats left after you break the best parts of me

Don't mind me, Mister
I'm just gonna miss her and pray I don't show it at all